Mommy time!

I just had my first whole weekend to myself since our lil princess has been born. It was harder than I thought it would be, however easier to enjoy myself than I thought. Does that make sense? I wasn't sure that I'd be able to handle two nights without seeing or being with Rhowan. The longest I've been away from her was one night at my moms or TJ's moms house. I needed a mini vaca/break. We have been back from Alaska for almost a month and its been mommy non stop. Don't get me wrong, I have had tons of help and been blessed with everyone being so in love with our princess that they come around to go places with us, help me, visit, etc. It is so nice to have both parents live so close by, my sister and the kids home all summer, and believe me, I take full advantage. We have kept very busy as you could see on the previous posts. I just wanted some down time, a break, 5 hours of un interrupted sleep, and some sun! So Ana and I thought what better time to go to her parents condo in Palm Springs. It is free, close by and we always have such a good time. She went up Friday after work and I was going to meet her there. Grandma/my MIL came to pick up Rhowan on Friday after surprising me and coming over so that I could go get a pedicure and offering to take Rhowan so that I could leave early Saturday morning. I didn't hesitate, I packed Rhowan's bag and helped her out to the car. Then I felt a flood of guilt, selfishness and like a horrible mom for sending her off just so I could have a weekend of mommy alone time. I was about a tear away from a breakdown when my MIL looks at me and says, "Are you ok? I want to take her, I love having her, have a fabulous weekend and enjoy." ahhhh, ok, don't twist my arm. I just felt so awful, like why do you need a break Heather, you don't work! Will Rhowan think I just left her? I started getting freakish again like I was in the beginning where I freaked about every little thing I did and second guessed everything I did as a mom. I just want to be the best possible mom I can be. Well Rhowan was happy as a clam in her car seat of grandma's car and off they went. :) Jen was here and kept pep talking me that I need me time, it keeps every mom sane, so enjoy and don't feel bad. So once I had a glass of wine and relaxed a bit, I was good! :)
My sister and Jen came over for some wine and a movie then off I went to Palm Springs first thing in the morning. I always love going to palm springs at the condo, it is such a low key weekend of hanging out at the pool, we have a no make up or doing hair rule, and we grocery shop and rent movies.
So I get there about 10:15 am and the first beer gets cracked open at 10:30! Yep, just like the good ol days! We headed straight for the pool and drank our beers in our floaties, reading magazines ( I actually got to catch up on all my magazines), catching up and talking cause I haven't seen Ana in weeks, went in for lunch then finally after 6 pm went inside to shower, make dinner and have some wine.
It was such a wonderful and much needed weekend. I needed it and loved it. I feel re energized and am soooo excited for Daddy to come home! Getting the girl time/talk with my bff then getting 7 plus hours of sleep and laying out by the pool...what more could you ask for? I am blessed! Rhowan was such a good girl as always, loved shopping all weekend with Grandma and sleeping in her bed that feels like a heavenly cloud :) lol...she is truly spoiled, but we wouldn't have it any other way. I was so excited driving home to see her, I could hardly contain the butterflies in my tummy. I missed her so much and was proud of myself for learning to balance. Some good friends of ours gave us very good advice after Rhowan was born. To make our children a part of our world, not our entire world. Don't get me wrong, Rhowan is our everything and my world, but I don't want to lose myself and who I am, I want to be me, a wife, friend, daughter, sister, and mom!
Anyway, great weekend, thank you Mil/Grandma and Grandpa for watching the princess and Ana for a much needed weekend.
Now, just less than 72 hours until daddy gets home! YAHOO!!!!!